Unbagging Uncanny X-Men Annual
The Uncanny X-Men Annual
#9
Release: 1985
Cover: 1985
Creators
| Writer | Chris Claremont |
| Artist | Arthur Adams |
| Cover Penciller | Arthur Adams |
| Cover Inker | Walter Simonson |
| Inker | Al Gordon, Mike Mignola |
| Colorist | Petra Goldberg-Scotese |
| Letterer | Tom Orzechowski |
| Editor | Ann Nocenti |
| Editor in Chief | Jim Shooter |
There’s a land where we can do all of that, where we can, at last–be happy: the home of the gods…Asgard!
(This is the second part of a two-part Unbagging. Go here if you haven’t read the first part yet.)
It’s a stormy night at Professor Charles Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters, but it’s not the sound of thunder that wakes the X-Men but rather the sound of a scream, a screaming coming from the team’s youngest member – younger even than some of the members of the JV team the New Mutants – Kitty Pryde.
Rachel Summers, a young psychic from a possible future, states that Kitty is in agony and that she must get to her ASAP, which she does with an assist from Kurt Wagner, the swashbuckling teleporter known as Nightcrawler.
While the other members of the team make their way to Kitty’s room the old-fashioned way, Rachel forges a mindlink with Kitty, discovering that it’s not a nightmare causing the young mutant’s distress but rather a psychic message from Kitty’s bestie Illyana.
Rachel is able to project an image of what’s in Kitty’s mind for the others to see.
The team soon determines that somehow their teammate Ororo and the New Mutants have ended up in Asgard, tangled in some evil scheme woven by Loki, with whom they recently had a run-in, and they decide that they have to find a way to rescue them.
Luckily, as most everyone does, Scott Summers AKA Cyclops happens to have some magic lightning bolts lying around that can be used to transport the team to Asgard.
With most everyone suited up, Scott kisses his wife Madelyne while they wait on Rachel, whose chosen outfit causes quite a stir.
Unbeknownst to Cyclops, in the future Rachel hails from, he is her father, and her mother is the fallen X-Man Jean Grey, also known as Marvel Girl, and later, and more to the point, Phoenix.
It seems that Rachel has decided to honor her late mother’s memory by taking on that code name and wearing a costume inspired by it. Cyclops is miffed, but Rachel points out that what she wears and what she calls herself are none of his concern. After all, hasn’t he moved on and started a new life with his new wife, Madelyne, the mother of his unborn child?
Of course, it’s worth pointing out that Madelyne is a dead ringer for Jean, so you can’t really call what Scott has done “moving on,” and also that Rachel is deliberately sticking it to Cyclops because she’s mad that he’s not with her mother – who, in her future, never actually became Phoenix – and that the child that his wife is pregnant with is not Rachel.
In any case, Cyclops concedes that Rachel is right when Madelyne presses him on it, and the team promptly teleports away, leaving Madelyne – who’s stuck dragonsitting Kitty’s pet dragon – to wonder aloud why she has this sudden fear that she’ll never see her husband again.
We cut to a scene that makes no sense, given what we know to be the current state of things, as the New Mutants are hanging out by the school’s pool. Magma – looking human – is using her powers to create a molten sculpture of a member of the faery folk and is complimented on it by Storm.
Sunspot and Cannonball are engaging in some practice with their respective abilities, while Sunspot talks about how he wishes there were a place where could truly belong rather than living in a world where he is hated and feared for being a mutant.
Inside the mansion, Danielle Moonstar – whom I incorrectly identified as “Psyche” in the last post, forgetting that she now goes by Mirage – is telling Rahne to leave her alone so that she can brood about her responsibilities as co-leader of the New Mutants, which makes Rahne sad.
Outside, Illyana, Doug, and Warlorck are all taking about their own problems, and then this false reality starts to fall apart as the scene shifts.
It turns out that it’s all a dream that Amara, who has been transformed into one of the faery folk herself, is having in Nidavellir, where she’s with her teammate Sam and the dwarf Eitri..
Her volcanic abilities are needed to encase the hammer that Eitri has forged for Loki in volcanic rock in order to transport it to the Asgard.
Eitri also provide Sam, whom he’s come to view as a son, with a magical mail shirt and a sword that can cut through anything that isn’t alive, to help him and the New Mutants win Ororo’s freedom from Loki.
Meanwhile, the X-Men arrive just in time to find Rahne’s wolf prince being assaulted by trolls. Though they don’t know he’s Rahne’s boyfriend, Wolverine isn’t ready to allow any animal to be harmed, so they rescued the injured prince.
Hela shows up, originally to claim the life of the wolf prince, but now contenting herself with the trolls who tried to kill him. She welcomes the X-Men, and in particular Rachel, as she reminds Hela of Jean. Apparently, the D’Bari that Jean killed when she was Dark Phoenix all ended up in Hel, so Hela is hoping for similar “good” things from Rachel.
(The other implication is that Hela rather than/in addition to being an individual death god is in some way an incarnation of Death itself, which is a bit of a talking point later on.)
Checking in on the other New Mutants, they’re all hanging out at the castle of the Enchantress, where Doug is using his language acuity to translate grimoires for Illyana so she can build up her magical arsenal to take on Loki. Focusing on magic seems to be unleashing Illyana’s dark side, as she’s being very mean to Doug and short-tempered with her other friends.
Warlock, disguised as a bird, is doing some reconnaissance on Loki, who notices the weird-looking bird and shoots him down with an arrow. When the screen Warlock was broadcasting to goes blank, Dani and Doug hop onto Brightwind to fly and check in on him, leaving Rahne and Shan to worry about how Illyana is changing.
Back at Loki’s place we find that Warlock wasn’t the only one flying around as a bird, as Ororo had been up in the air in bird form thanks to Freya’s Cloak of Golden Feathers, and we learn that she seems to be completely under Loki’s spell. Ororo’s own desire to take to the skies as she was once able to do when she had her mutant powers makes an easy “in” for Loki’s manipulations.
Back in the forest, Rachel is reading the mind of the wolf prince and sees that his thoughts are mostly on Rahne, whose trail he’s been on.
Rogue and Rachel then go off in search of some clothes that will allow them to blend in with the locals.
Dani stops by the tavern to pick up Bobby and everyone seems to be freaked out by her presence. Even a drunk guy who hits on her backs away after he gets a closer look.
While they ponder that oddness, they find the injured Warlock who also freaks out when he sees Dani. He takes a shot at her, grabs Doug, and runs away. Some Asgardian warriors come along to see what all the fuss is about but go silent when Dani shoots them a look.
All of this beginning to cause Bobby, who has mostly been thinking that Asgard is a place where can be happy, to begin to have doubts about whether they truly belong here.
The X-Men had split up, and Rogue, Cyclops, Nightcrawler, and Colossus, following the wolf prince’s lead, arrive at the home of the Enchantress. The wolf prince rushes in excitedly and is greeted by an equally excited Rahne…who then has to castigate herself for being happy.
The reunion between Colossus AKA Peter Rasputin and his little sister Illyana is less happy, as Illyana is cold and dismissive and vaguely terrifying.
The team has arrived just as Illyana was ready to cast a locator spell that will allow her to grab Ororo, but as soon as she casts it Loki appears and zaps them all.
Doug and Warlock are in hiding while Warlock slowly fades away. Warlock explains that he saw Dani as bearing the aspect of the “the destroyer, the one who claims life,” and he feared that she had come for his. While Dough doesn’t really understand – even though understanding what people are saying is supposed to be his thing – he offers some of his lifeforce to Warlock.
Kitty, Wolverine, and Rachel had gone into the city to find Thor, but Thor’s not home, as he’s busy leading the dead warriors of Valhalla into Hel to free innocent souls – and epic story all its own, and one that features one of the greatest scenes of redemption in comics history, a pale imitation of which we got in Thor: Ragnarok – but fortunately have arrived at the same time as Sam and Amara.
Loki has the other X-Men and New Mutants (plus the wolf prince) bound, but wants the full set, so he summons a rock troll to find them, and puts collars on Rahne and the prince that turn them into monstrous wolves who will do his bidding whom he renames Grimfang and Bleakheart. Why? Because Loki is a messy bitch who lives for drama*.
*Now on a T-shirt!
While he’s distracted with that, Nightcrawler teleports out of his chains, wraps his tail around Cyclops, and kisses Rogue on the cheek, allowing Rogue to absorb both of their powers, teleport out of her chains, and hit Loki with some heat vision concussive force.
Rogue will only have the powers for a minute, so she makes the most of it by wailing on Loki, but she’s interrupted by a familiar voice telling her to stop.
It’s Ororo, who is too confused by Loki’s magic to understand what’s happening.
It’s enough of a distraction for Loki to cast a spell binding Rogue.
Outside, Dani and Doug meet up with the rest of the teams (minus Doug and Warlock), and Dani sees some strange “spirit-face” hovering over Wolverine.
She doesn’t get much time to think about it as Loki’s rock troll and Grimfang and Bleakheart show up and attack. Wolverine gets bit by a dragon with venomous fangs. Sam’s mail protects him from being bitten and he tries to give the creature a good whack with his sword, knowing that it won’t do any real harm.
It does, however, cut through the collar, allowing Rahne to return to her true form and regain her free will.
Just then, Doug and Warlock show up, and the merry band of mutants is able to take out their opponents, though not before some of them abscond with Amara and the hammer.
They decide to split up again, with Rahne leading Kitty and Sam to the prisoners and the others infiltrating the Hall of Heroes where Loki is holding a ceremony to make Storm into the Goddess of Thunder.
We get some more Easter Eggs, along with a patented Wolverine lecture about how this isn’t a game.
Wolverine is sweaty because the venom coursing through his veins is too much for his mutant healing factor to handle.
Back at Loki’s place, Shan took possession of Illyana, who was already being controlled by Loki, which freed the other X-Men (except Colossus) from the spell that Illyana was using to control them, and they all get together with Kitty, Sam, and Rahne.
In the Hall of Heroes, an attempt to stop the ceremony fails, and Ororo takes hold of the hammer that Loki had made for her.
Wolverine rushed towards her to try to talk her down, but Loki tells her that it’s not really her friend and so she starts blasting him with the power of the hammer.
Nothing will stop Wolverine from reaching his friend, however, and Ororo is confused as to how a creature of evil could show such courage.
As Storm begins to understand what’s happening, Hela shows up to claim Wolverine’s soul. Dani rides in and tells Hela to back off, at which point Hela reveals that Dani is now a Valkyrie and should be on her side. Though she’s shocked by this news, it explains the weirdness – like seeing Wolverine’s impending death looming over him – but it doesn’t change whose side she’s on, so she tries, and fails, to fight Hela.
The rest of the X-Men, including Storm, who has been restored to her true self, decide to take on Hela as well, and the rest of the Valkryior show up as well to avenge the attack on their sister.
Hela, who also has trouble back at home thanks to what Thor and friends are up to, decides she doesn’t have time for this shit, so she takes off.
Storm turns her wrath on Loki, but he has even more control over the hammer than she does, so it’s to no avail.
Ultimately, things aren’t settled by a battle, but rather by Kitty telling Loki off.
We get an interlude with Karnilla, Queen of the Norns, who is watching this all, amused to see Loki get his comeuppance, and for his plans – which interfered with her own – being foiled.
Loki agrees that they can all leave, but they all have to leave. No one can stay.
This breaks the heart of the wolf prince, who can’t bear to lose Rahne, and the heart of Rahne, who can’t choose to stay.
They all also have to give up any gifts they received, like Sam’s enchanted mail and sword, and the knowledge Illyana gained from reading all those grimoires, and Illyana has to release the Enchantress from her imprisonment.
Also, Amara will be returned to her human form.
Dani being a Valkyrie, however, cannot be undone by Loki, so she gets to keep her horse.
Loki makes a last pitch to Ororo, knowing how hard it will be for her to give up the power that she’s regained via the hammer. But Ororo isn’t buying what Loki is selling and uses the power of the hammer one last time to destroy the hammer, melting it into formless slag and tossing it at Loki’s feet.
Though he’s outwardly fuming, this is secretly Loki’s fetish and just makes him want Ororo all the more.
The mutants are all sent on their way, the Valkyries agree to keep their mouths shut about Loki’s little scheme, and the God of Lies is left to contemplate what to do with the lump of metal he’s been left with.
While I like the story in its entirety, I have to admit that I always preferred the first part to the second. I’m not sure why, but I think it’s a matter of preferring the New Mutants brand of angst to the X-Men’s brand. Oh, Rachel’s sad because the past she’s travelled to isn’t actually her past! She doesn’t dare tell Cyclops the truth about who she is while simultaneously daring him to figure it out on his own! Madelyne is worried about her future with the man who married her because she looks exactly like his dead girlfriend, the mass murderer!
But beyond that, the appeal of the New Mutants’ story was the appeal that Asgard had for them. That temptation to stay in this magical place isn’t there for the varsity team who are there specifically on a rescue mission.
We were just getting the usual X-Men drama, as they weren’t responding to new possibilities the way the New Mutants were. The tension caused by the conflicting desires to return home and to stay in Asgard made things seem a bit fresher and made the standard X-Men stuff seem stale in contrast.
I also found the art to be a bit off. The team of Milgrom and Mignola just didn’t complement the pencils of Adams the way that Terry Austin did in the first installment.
(Also, we didn’t get the non-stop Illyana bikini action, though we did get some in Amara’s dream sequence. Because even she wanted to see more of that.)
It still looks great, just not as great, though I did – and still do – love the design of the Thorified Storm.
One thing I did like – and this was common in the X-books at the time, given the friendship between Claremont and the Simonsons – was the way this tied in with then-current events in Thor. The Marvel Universe was almost always cohesive, or at least intended to be, but some corners of it were more cohesive than others, and I always appreciated that it was especially cohesive in this corner.
It’s a solid conclusion to the story that began with the New Mutants, but I kind of wish it had ended with them as well without any sort of assist from the older (except Kitty) team. A victory for and by the “X-Babies” seemed to be what was set up, and while they definitely did their part, I think involving the X-Men took something away from what we might have gotten.
Still, that brings this first-ever two-part Unbagging to a close, and I hope you enjoyed my examination of this beloved classic as I enjoyed revisiting it.
Born and raised in the sparsely populated Upper Peninsula of Michigan, Jon Maki developed an enduring love for comics at an early age.
